An 80-year-old man named Manny wrote to Rappler's advice column explaining his desire to bring back his preferred caregiver, Angel, after his children removed her without his knowledge.
Manny, who suffered a stroke at age 75 six weeks after his wife's death, reports no impact on his mental health or speech. He uses a cane or wheelchair when needed but does not require financial support from his children, though he appreciates any 'baon' they give him. At 80, his children insisted on hiring a caregiver, and he only liked Angel, a younger woman without formal credentials who listened to him more than others.
Angel left abruptly three months ago without explanation; Manny later learned his children had asked her to leave, and she returned to Nueva Ecija province. He has tried three other caregivers since but remains unhappy with them. When he told his children he wanted to fetch Angel back, they forbade it.
In their response, Jeremy Baer questions why Manny, in full possession of his faculties, allowed this interference and suggests calling a family meeting to assert control over his life and set boundaries. Dr. Margarita Holmes encourages him to contact Angel directly if possible, emphasizing his right to independence as a grown man. She notes that caregivers address not just physical but social needs, citing Harvard-trained therapist Kasley Killam's 2024 book 'The Art and Science of Connection,' which highlights social health's role in well-being.
The column frames the situation as a potential power struggle between Manny and his children, with Angel as an unwitting pawn.
